Tonight was started in a very nice event. I met my ex workmates in a social chatroom that is quite famous nowadays in Indonesia. Everybody who is someone will have it on their gadgets. It is like "a must have" list. Do noted here i do not infuse a sarcasm due to my action in having this lil thing that i mentioned above lol. Am i being a double standard person??? Definitely yes lovies, i am hehe at least in this case, that case, those cases hahaha now you catch me red handed.
Back to the topic then i realize how often we have these emptiness inside after such a great time just because you finaly know that for your short happiness you have hurt others? For the so called nice time you were eating your brothers/sisters' meat - ghibah? Subhanallah astaghfirullah astaghfirullah astaghfirullah....as much as i love the silaturrohmi now i am questioning myself. Why i did those horrible things whenever the chances arise? Why cant i be the sound of wisdom in the dire of needs? Why i am so lame while i am not a novice on these kind of occasions? Why Ya Allah Ya Rabb the taste leaves bitter one on me now? Ya Rabb The Lord of the Merciful, forgive us, forgive them and forgive me. I am lost in this battle.