(((Hear ya hear ya!! March is coming!))) this is one of 2 months that i always feel anxious in a year. Whether i plan it to be relax full, ignorance or just let it by, the anxieties will drop themselves on my head "boink" , they will do like the one in a cartoon movie.
Lemme cut it out now, so i can pile up my anxieties more next time. Yes every March is my birthday. Yes in which the A is going to add up the sum. Yes i am not that worry morry dorry sorry over the white hairs, crows' feet on my forehead, smiling lines or even all those famous gravity theories bout women. Nada. Those are not my worries that in the end caused the anxieties. It is due to my worry in becoming a worse person the more i am older. Especially when you are a spinster (euuuuuy i do not really like the word, its almost like splinter, so painful). and more over if you are Javanese.
In Javanese culture, a spinster is considered as a grumpy ole woman who cant control their tempers due to their un-fullfilled some of aspects in their live. How cruel huh the prejudice. But that is so true. I was grown up while listening those comments toward spinsters. Just like being a spinster is a degrading status lol.
now with those concepts in mind, up to now, i always try to introspect myself every birthday. To ask myself, do i am becoming such a grumpy person like those people said? Do i become ridiculous in my actions? Do i too emotional for any little things that "normal people" never do?
Thus the anxieties come from......