I am in my usual condition now. In the corner of my life, in my uncertainty emotions. In my hollow feeling.
The feeling of being un-worthy for others, wory to be left behind, wory too much to be a burden, and most of all feelin so sensitive over anything and everything.
I wish i can blame my med...in which has been stopped ages ago. Or blame my PMS..which one?? Or my natural basketcase traits?
Will someone cater me into the white jacket condition??? Puhleazzzzzzz dont...i am not that crazy. A lil bit demented due to my rants and whines, mayhap. But definitely not loosing a grip here.
I am what i am, no need to call a shrink to dig my past. I take the whole resposible toward all my actions.
But ya Allah....i am better to go away from population. Since it seems whatever i do, is always rub people in the wrong way, though it is not my intention.....never.
Now, i can only pit pat put with my heart to wait for the grovel to pound to give me the verdict due to my different things that i have to hold. Subhanallah....praise to Allah.
Sunday, 20 February 2011
Throw my hand on a blade for ya
You know i'd do anything for ya
And those are the refrain part of a song that i fall in love to at this moment. Since last night my playlist is only playing this song by Bruno Mars - Grenade. The lyric is so horrible harsh but somehow when i listen the emotion of Bruno in singing it, his ways in performing it and also the music......OMG i am just hooked, sank, and lined with it.
Even in my splitting head condition now, i still listen it and i do hope to be able to stand up and shaking my body to this melodious song.
And i'd jump on the train for ya
You know i'd do anythin for ya
I would go through all this pain
Take a bullet straight to my brain......