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Saturday, 20 October 2012

11 Days Counting

Today is 20th of October....another 11 days before i take a different path from my usual path. On Thursday 1st of November my life will be turning into a pivot point, again. I will be another number of un-employment in this country. No i do not plan to be a drama queen since i am the one who decides to quit from my wonderfull job. Great friends, great students, great place to learn many new things *even today i learned about the education for children and how to understand the Government's policies esp in economy* gosh.....great place huh? I just share my knowledge in English and these lovelies pupils of us are willing to give another knowledges in return, subhanallah. We are applying the simbiosa mutualism arggggh nee with her straying mind. I do the resignation with a heavy heart for i really love teaching. I love to motivate people in learning this language, besides they say i am a crazy tutor to behold lol. But alhamdulillah i always infuse the same understanding again and again toward my students, that when you love what you do in life, insyaallah Allah will take care of you *hey only for the good deeds mind you lol* so they do not feel so uneasy in letting me go. Though somehow its me who feels broken hearted again and again in seeing them questioning my reasons. And just like a broken casseste i reply each question with knowing they do it due to their love and lost in me.....nee...un-important person who can somehow entice them within my magick hahaha. It reminds me again with some words that i have shared with my students;

"I am not your teacher, i am helping you to improve your English."

Gosh.....teary moment here *palming my face* Somehow till this night i am not sure why Allah Ya Rabb gave me the decision on our istikharoh's prayer -my sister and i- that i must quit. And i have postponed it for 9 months. 9 long months that i choose to foresake the answer due to my needs in paying my health's bills, my ego, my logic that couldnt grab how can i live without an income and so on and so forth. un-gratefull i was. I knocked His door of mercy to find the solution and i gave HIM my cold shoulder when i dont like the answer.

So last month, i brave myself in saying, i resign officially on 1st of November. And i hope i am still good enough to accept HIS blessings by getting another job to behold with a better way in the future amen.