Songs....Songs....Songs

A lullaby song to be enjoyed when You are sleepy my lovelieeees. Like what i am right now.....

Remind me about when i was a kid and playing with my friends......

Alhamdulillah.....Here I am

Hiiiiii lovelieeeees.......................................here i am back again in here to say hi after some times enjoying my 'me time with Raminku, my health, and myself' now i am back. I lost my words since there are too many things happened since last time i wrote till this afternoon. But insyaAllah everything is fine my lovelies....its only a life....enjoy the ride till it stops. And somehow i still cant find my wittiness...just want to say hi to all of You and upload this sad romantic song that it does not reflect my feelings but somehow i love the rhythm in it for it soothes my feelins ....enjoy it.

Kala Cinta Menggoda
Sejak jumpa kita pertama kulangsung jatuh cinta.
Since the first time we met, i have fallen in love with You
Walau kutahu kau ada pemiliknya.
Although i know You have someone
Tapi kutak dapat membohongi hati nurani.
But i cant lie to myself
Kutak dapat menghindari gejolak cinta ini.
I cant deny these loving feelings

Reff.
Maka ijinkanlah aku mencintaimu
So please allow me to love You
Atau bolehkan aku sekedar sayang padamu. x2
Or just allow me to show my affections to You (2x)

Memang serba salah rasanya tertusuk panah cinta.
Its difficult to avoid these feelings from Cupid's arrows 
Apalagi aku juga ada pemiliknya.
Especially when i have someone else too
Tapi kutak mampu membohongi hati nurani.
But i cant lie to myself
Kutak mampu menghindari gejolak cinta ini.
I cant deny these feelings

Maka ijinkanlah aku mencintaimu
So please allow me to love You
Atau bolehkan aku sekedar sayang padamu. 
Or just allow me to show my affections to You 

A Poem of Schuon - 5 Days to Go

Evening 
Hast thou heard the nightingale's song
At the sunset , with the skies aflame ?
When all is silent and is listening -A song of love from Krishna's flute. 


Deep in the wood , the flute's sound
Seemed to ask :
When will Radha her Krishna see ?
Soon, yea , soon !

A poem from Schuon that has been shared by Raminku.....lovely hmm 

Multiple Choices

Hiiii my lovelies....*jumping up and down due to too much energies from my 3rd glass of tutu*...have you ever thought how live keeps on giving us choices but somehow each of us always chooses and falls in the same part? How come? Why? Havent we learned a lot of wisdom words in that sense of thing? Havent we heard bout the history or experience from people surround us or even the one before us? So how come? Why? 

I am not sure why and how my lovelies, but you can be sure if there is a way to fly to Rabb and ask Him about it, that will be 1 of the questions that i would like to ask Him. Why my brain and heart are so persistent in choosing the same answer again and again. Since last time i checked, i am still and will be always a human and not a mule. Hmmm i even do not think that our mules nowadays are that bull headed or mule headed lol. So why then? Why as the greatest creation of Him we are so persistently stupid effortlessly? 

And those multiple choices are being created by Rabb Wa Ta'Alla actually are not the accessories of life. Those are choices to be taken my lovelies.....unfortunately often times it is ignored by us. And alhamdulillah He never deserted us for any reason even when we have left Him many times, deserted Him oftenly. For that    is His love toward us. The most persistent creature in fending Him off with all the 'garish decorations' in this world....astaghfirullah astaghfirullah astaghfirullah. Lets find Him my lovelies for He is closer than our vein in our neck.

Everything And Anything

Human is such a fickle creature. We need to hold the reigns in any situation. Somehow in those moments of obscenities we forget that we are not the Owner of this live. We are merely the pupets of His many strings in live. That each of us has our own script to be taken seriously till the curtains drop to end our scenes.

Those understandings lame as it is, but that is the basic and utmost understanding if you are a moslem. Be tawakkal...be ikhlas....and be gratefull all of the times. And my lovelies, those are soooooo d#mn difficult. No pun intended or trying to be so brash, just stating a fact. It is going to be easier to trash around for any misfortune that comes upon us and emanating negative vibes afterward. But that is not the point my lovelies. We are learning to be tawadduk, be a good subject, be a sub-serviant creature in front of Rabb for He has promised the love if we can face His world and the wrath if we disobey His ways.

Are we being a submissive by following His path? NOPE...just being a responsible person. Responsible with the life that has been lent to you by Him. Does He need all those respects, bows and pretentious acts to show His Power over the living and the world just like a juxtapox character in 1 scene play? Nope....it is for our own sake....for our soul needs that path toward Him to feel at ease.

So as much as these turn out events shake me to the core, pray for me my lovelies....that my soul will always protect me to walk on His and only His path, amien. I pray you are the same there my lovelies....i pray the same for you.

Tonight

Tonight i experience a nice and touchy experience that i even do not know how to react. It is started with my  visitation time to the hospi to see one of my sisters in law. She is being admitted in the hospi due to a surgery plan on the day of tomorrow  Since 2 weeks ago we found out that she has a malign CA in one of her organ. SubhanAllah. Her children are still young. They are still about 11-10 years old. And this news shattered all of our hearts. CA always is, right? It brings again my two expi with CA. Yes my lovelies like i said in one of my upload that i am a survival of CA. But that is not the thing why i write this..I write this because somehow my brother and his wife educate their children about this event on the morrow in the most simple thing in the easiest way without trying to cover up their gentle ages but also not trying to put the whole gorries. And these exchange dialogues that makes me shock, amaze and a lil bit carried away. These dialogues below were happening in the time they start to go home after the visiting hours is finish:

Mom                         - "Pray for mommy okay. Pray Allah Ya Rabb to meet us again."

Kaka (1st kids)       - "Mommy i will surely miss You. Be well soon and if You are well later on,       do not forget to buy me a Samsung tablet, pwease."

Luqman (2nd kids) - "Love You mommy, be well pwease, we will see You again right?"

Hanif (3rd kids)      - "Mommy lets pray together that Rabb wont put You in RIP in the operation room ya. Promise us to open Your eyes when the operation is finish!"

Mom                     - "InsyaAllah Yes.....i will open my eyes after the operation and we can face the next treatments ."

Ya Allah.....Your Subjects are solely Yours but Ya Allah....can i ask Your strength for all of us in facing this situation? Do not let our din be weakened due to our love and emotion toward my sister in law. And with Your permission, give her a chance to see her children grow till later days....

And those prayers from my niece and nephews reminded me so much toward my own demanding and threatening prayers when i was a kid seeing my mom in her dying bed (rest her soul). Unfortunately or extremely i ended by making a bargain with me as the collateral to help my mom's soul. And i lost since He is  the Decker, the Player and also The Winner. That was my first and hopefully never again war toward Him because He did not fulfill my wishes though He said in all his Books to ask everything and anything to Him. Astaghf irullah astaghfirullah astaghfirullah..... hopefully none of You my lovelies nor the family of mine ever expi such a silly notion bout life, amien. Life is not our playground to be taken it for granted with Allah as our nanny to fulfill all our whims. Life is more about the place we are studying to be a better subject of Him. To make Him and all His Messengers proud with our constant effort in being good, as it has been agreed by our own soul before He put us in this world.

26 Days To Go

Hi my lovelies....in the next 26 days i will meet my love.....for the very first time. No need to pose the jaw dropping emoticon pweaseeee. It is only a live. A phase or path in my life that i have taken with open eyes though i was not preparing or dreaming of it to be happened to me. If you are my long time lovelies i believe you are quite familiar with my words "Its only a live." But it is true....everything happens in this part time world is only a way to spend the time as a living thing. Though sometimes it is too much and un-bearable but its only a live my lovelies. It will phase.

Do you think i am bluffing? Or that i am pretending to be nonchalant bout it while actually i am seething inside? Well you are partially right. I was so worry dorry morry in the beginning of the days after we got engaged by skype. Yes my lovelies....we were engaged by skype. But the worries were not due to our future, but because so many people that i call friends are not supporting me at all. They are shunning me away. They are  waiting for my downfall with this marriage's plan. But then i felt  that somehow their actions are actually showing the way i treat people surround me. Remember Allah said that whatever happen to us actually are our own doing. Remember what you sow is what you reap. How fitting are those words. I can only blame myself for what i am receiving now. But i wont punish myself now. I am battered already, there will be time enough to reshape and recharge my way of behaving toward others. But not now when i am in a fragile condition.

Alhamdulillah my hubby to be and families that always pray for us keep on giving me support...so now i am at breeze and starting to accept the way my friends are behaving. They might do that out of love and concern but the funny thing is now again Rabb show me how silly is depending our happiness on His subjects for when everything and everyone left you, it will be only you and Him to guide you through. 

So when all bride is preparing their lovey dovey marriage with their friends and families, i prepare all my guests and families in case somehow Rabb decides our plan differently not as we have planned. And my lovelies....there is nothing i repeat nothing can deter your plan for whatever it is unless Allah Ya Rabb decide it. Be well my lovelies....insyaAllah my prayers while i am writing these words are coming through to your life to bring contentment and strength to face everything. It is only a live my lovelies....enjoy it. It will pass.