Talking With Sasie

Talking with Sasie while my Baby wasnt there is like a crazy moment happens again. I have known her since 2000. When she was a young dedicated girl with her family to support with that made her took 2 different kind of jobs. From morning up to 4.30 pm she worked her butt out in a company as a secretary. And at 5-8 pm she taught in my office as an English Tutor. And sharp after our office hours were done, we couldnt see a prim proper lady but she would be replaced by a goddess of night that would shake the dance floor till she couldnt stand lol.

As a person who loves to move with the music, i always admire her in juggling her activities but still able to enslave her body till midnight with the music in clubbing houses in Surabaya. No i wont judge or condemn clubbing masyaAllah nooo, its not and never my or our right to condemn others. For there are different kind of stages in life where nur or Allah's spot comes strongly toward you. And those thingies in your past, present and future will be your own responsible. Besides if i dont 'hold' my hijab tightly, who knows what will happen to me since loud and live music does entice and exhilarate me in a sense that i cant explain.

Sasi is a long lasting friend. My best friend who knows how crazy i am and also respect my needs to close to Him....without any snickering comments bout my crazy traits in which might be unwanted by those stuffy religious people.

Maybe thus why we stick together till now. Because knowing our differences in seeing Him. Our paths in looking for Him. Both of us are still travellers in life. We just support each other to find our own Moksa. SubhanAllah....insyaAllah till we are old ya Sie. Insyaallah.

Differences

Differences is a simple word that consists of 11 letters, 7 consonants and 4 vowels. Very simple. Very pack. But somehow the meaning is about differences. Differences in any kind and aspect in everything. Like people in Middle Java will say "Saras or sehat for healthy" people in East Java will say "waras for healthy" buuuut if you use the term in Middle Java "waras" they will think you are stating a fact to explain the health condition from a mental illness. Shocking how the same word can be giving us different meanings...subhanallah. Hillarious if you are not the one who stated it, but since i ever did it, believe me it is quite embarassing lol.

And this morning i faced another jlebzh *the sound of knife stabbs the flesh* moment. I am soooo ashamed in knowing my differences with someone that i hold dear, caused us into a corner where we have to back off and take a deep breath while saying astaghfirullah.....astaghfirullah. Life does give us many facets that we have to stay afloat not due to the survival only but how to immerse from every difference as a winner without compramising our deen, insyaAllah.

23:26 On 12th January

Ano happy moment in live. Too bad it is not to be announced. Allah is right...smtm a happiness shouldnt be exposed due to many people are sad out there for whatever reason. Thank You Schatz-ku alhamdulillah.

Subhanallah

It's true lovieeeees.....*gulping the air as much as nee's can* that in this new and modern and sophisticated time in which is belong to Kali Yuga, to do a good deed that is hallal is considered difficult and frowned upon by the people. For example my wedding's plan *the sky opens up to drop the veneti* when me and hubby to be tried to approach in the religious side, most people close to me able to find the flaws on it. But when we try to bluff into the sinners' ways hmmmm no comment from anyone. Quite interesting how people nowadays face the right and wrong of the deeds....subhanallah.

I might be wrong in this hubbubs buuuuut at least it is my own mistake, to be faced, to be known, to be learned and to be followed in the end as long it is good.

Feeling Like A Piece of Meat

These days i do feel like a pond of meat in the market. Everyone says to have a claim on me thus give them a right how to cook me or just simple dish me out. Not a nice feeling, i can sure you. First because i don't really into meat since it gives me a lot of efforts in chewing it, then secondly because i feel like they know my life better than me, and lastly my own deterioration towards the hubbubs.

Many times in the past whenever i face this deadlock situation *though i am not thinking like that Liebe-ku* i always hope that i am purely a simple minded person with none whatsoever of inner wisdom that talks too much inside my head *just rest assure i am not a schizophrenic insyaAllah* but can a girl just wanna have fun pweeeeese?

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Understanding

Understanding is such a "funny" word in my opinion. Since in my simple mind it is derived from the words UNDER and STAND. So if someone roughly translates those 2 words combine into one it will definitely give different meaning from the one that we normally know. It will be known as a pose where the speaker is standing under something or if we dig deeper it will be another meaning of submission over something hmmm. And in the end this word is just showing the leniency or giving up over something. Very different apart huh? But that is how my brain is working. And subhanallah though the literal and nee's meanings are sound so simple but in the application is so difficult. So difficult....

Happiness VS Sadness

Hi lovies.....in our life, there are many happy moments that can only give us a gaga expression, speechless and somehow a palpitating heart that might bring you into the cardiac unit lol. And before these 2 days, i always thought that a happiness that we have or get actually has the opposite part in someone in this world. So i always hold myself from being overboard in my happiness because then my opposite part *the one who gets the sadness* will get it abundantly also. And thinking that someone gets "too much sadness" just because of me it is something that i cant stomach astaghfirullah. But there is a lil tinny detail that i havent thought even before i write this part. Who am i? Dare to think that i am the one who put a control over others' welfare??? Astaghfirullah....astaghfirullah....astaghfirullah, Ya Rabb the Define Being, The Lover of all creatures....do forgive this humble subject of Yours.
Alhamdulillah Schatz-ku was discussing these things with me last night. Somehow i just realise again that every thought in a knowledge that you have should be discussed bout to avoid any wrongness in doing. That 2 heads are better than 1 head, its true.

Well Lovies, 2012 is almost over, and 2013 will come, allow me to say May Allah protect us all from the bad things in the next year amien.